The Wybers Wood Temperance Society
Improve yourself both physically and mentally by leading an abstemious life !
Yes folks you heard it here first, I’m looking for volunteers to join me in the creation of the only Temperance Society in Lincolnshire.
Likely candidates will be those such as myself who have put behind them a life of sin and debauchery.
There comes a time in an elderly bachelors life when he must hang up his spurs and lead a more pious life. Excessive drinking and smoking must be now and forever a thing of the past as are the sins of the flesh !
Instead of revelling in the above delights I shall now be concentrating my attentions and efforts on the more boring civilized aspects of life.
Reading improving books, cultivating my kitchen garden, rigorous exercise, country walks and cold showers !
This new monastic life is something I shall be endeavouring to convince others to take up so any recruits to the cause simply sign up by dropping me a line.
If there are enough I may consider purchasing an old rectory or deconsecrated church where we can all live out our twilight years in piety with nothing to keep us warm except the thoughts of what once was or indeed could have been. Sounds great - I can sense you’re all interested.
My main concern about this new venture will be my position as
The Most Eligible Bachelor on Wybers Wood
Will I required to relinquish this honorary position ?
Indeed, if I don’t will I be drummed out of office ?
So there you go if you see an elderly man shuffling along in a monk’s habit looking more like brother Cadfael than Daniel Craig you’ll know who it is !
They think it’s all over - it is now 
Little Brother said,
February 3, 2008 @ 7:36 pm
Rod,
If there’s any hot chicks in the society then count me in
LB
Witches of Eastwick said,
February 3, 2008 @ 8:42 pm
Rod,
We will fly over the Goldeneye monastic dwelling to drop food parcels and little notes of encouragement (Barnes Wallis style) to keep you on the righteous track
We rather like the idea of you taking over an old church so at last you could put in a proper days DIY work! Another plus side would be a ready made pulpit should the urge grab you to preach… presumably several times a day if the past is anything to go by
Look, forget Wybers most eligible bachelor and embrace the title of Rod the Revivalist, campanologist extraordinaire…
WoE
p.s. this would tie in nicely with our new venture into designer linen Habits for the modern monk, one size fits all
the dinosaur said,
February 4, 2008 @ 8:11 am
Rod, I think I must have woken up in an alternative universe, its frightening! Why don’t you build your own monastry in Wybers Wood, as a penance for your past excesses, the exercise will fulfil part of your new agenda and the people of Grimsby will join you in droves I’m sure
Rod said,
February 4, 2008 @ 8:40 am
LB
hot chicks will be the only people denied access to the society, due to their divisive influence.
They are now but a memory
RC
Rod said,
February 4, 2008 @ 8:46 am
WoE
thanks fo rthe food drop offer - make sure it’s all low fat though !
Look, forget Wybers most eligible bachelor and embrace the title of Rod the Revivalist, campanologist
Maybe I am simply hanging on to the title as a vestige of my past, like a shipwrecked sailor clings to a piece of driftwood.
Campanology sounds OK I guess but I don’t really see how coin collecting is going to help
RC
Rod said,
February 4, 2008 @ 8:55 am
Dino
you are a man of rare vision !
Wybers Wood is actually built on a land once occupied by a former monastery.
Hence my street name Greyfriars !
I shall look into the history and bring about the renaissance you suggest.
I’m not sure I’ll be joined in droves, the good people of Grimsby are not historically given over to sobriety but one can live in hope …
Best
Rod
Witches of Eastwick said,
February 4, 2008 @ 6:04 pm
Rod,
May we tentatively ask how it’s going so far? Tomorrow we’ll expect to see you bare foot and wearing a loin cloth (winter weight, quality cloth naturally
)
Might whip up some gougeres so you must tell us if they form part of the forbidden list…
WoE
Rod said,
February 4, 2008 @ 6:06 pm
WoE
Gougere is well within my saintly parameters I’m pleased to say - easy on the butter though
As to how it’s going - well I lost an entire day topday thanks to the comment from The Dinosaur !
RC