Rod Collins

Once again the mail bag has been filling up for our guest writer Rod Damon.
It certainly is a varied bag and rest assured all those that write in get their letters passed on to the great man himself.

Obviously he is usually busy being an International Secret Agent and what with his legendary womanizing often leaves him strapped for time. He does read them all though and is especially responsive to those who see him as something of an Agony Uncle. In that spirit he has furnished me with some answers to his letters.
I hand you over now to Rod Damon aka The Coxeman - Goodbye and … Good luck !

Evening folks !
Now that we’ve gotten rid of that nancy-boy who runs, or tries to, this site we’ll get down to it. Hopefully this time he’ll not edit me. Here are some letters answered and advice given.
If you have any problems or questions you can post them and I’ll give you the benefit of my experience !

Dear Mr Damon,
my wife is forever nagging me to do more about the house - she says her friends husbands all do housework and the like.
Do you think this is true ?

Arthur in Kent

Arthur forget the household chores - expunge all thoughts of housework from your mind !
It’s woman’s work, you’re married - if you’ve got a dog you don’t bark yourself !
You may have to put up with the nagging though, sounds like you’ve failed to control her from the start, now you’re paying the price - take note any would-be-husbands out there.

Dear RD
my boyfriend has taken to using moisturizer and buffing his nails, having read your comments on things like this I am beginning to wonder whether his is what you would call a “real man”

Miss Concerned - Grimsby

Dear Miss Concerned
you are right to be alarmed, many women would let this slip or miss it altogether. It is suggests to me the classic symptoms of early homosexuality.
This is clearly no good to you, dump this loser and find a real man. If you’re hot I may be able to help myself

Hey Coxeman !
Long time reader first time writer !
Sadly I came to you’re writing too late, i.e. after I got married.
I am where I am and I know you cannot help me there. The problem is my ball and chain keeps going on about starting a family. I would value your opinion as I don’t intend to make any serious moves without your opinion anymore

Aubrey - Reading

Aubrey,
as you say you have already committed the dumb move of taking a wife. I’d bet a £1 to a pinch of s*&t your missus has a friend with a new baby. This makes them clucky - they’re all the same.
Women are genetically unable to resist the lure of spitting these little horrors out, one after another in some cases.
I would recommend avoiding this at all costs. Children are generally unpleasant, time consuming and not to mention expensive.
It could be cheaper to ditch her now, you’ll get shafted with the divorce settlement of course but it may be cheaper in the long run.
If not, get a vasectomy on the quiet or else she’ll trap you with one of these so called “accidents”

Dear Mr Damon
I am at my wits end ! Please can you help ?
I have just discovered my husband has been seeing other women and I am devastated. His job involves travelling a lot so I am used to him being away but I thought I could trust him and he would be faithful.
We had a massive argument and I think he may leave me - what can I do - I’m devastated !

Firstly, pull yourself together woman !
He seems like a solid hard-working fellow from what you say so the problem probably lies with you.
If he is away for anything like a week or above then it is only natural that he will seek solace elsewhere, I’m sure you both realise and accept this.
If, however, it is only a day or so here and there then you are probably boring in bed.
You need to redress this situation with a makeover, whole new underwear draw and some new ideas and techniques on how to satisfy your man.

Dear Rod
my wife cares more about her bloody dog than me, what can I do to get her to lavish the affection on me she does on Buster ?

Your first step should be to kill the dog ! If you have a gun just shoot it, if not rat poison should do the trick.
Women and pets don’t really work as it can take their minds and attention away from their domestic duties and what really matters.
Your needs clearly come first - you’re the man of the house after all

I’m going to call it a night now as I’m getting bored with these dull questions. If you need any solid advice I’ll answer any questions or problems you have

Keep it Up !
The Coxeman

PS: See my other problem page here
PPS: It’s much better than this one !