The Benefits of Marriage for Men
Reading an article in The Times called Guyland stuck in the world of male spinsters got me thinking !
An eminent American sociologist has written a book suggesting the unmarried men in their late 30s, 40s and above who were once the object of jealousy are now the object of pity.
Also men should get married to save their lives - single men die sooner - so get married to save your life !
Once upon a time the phrase “confirmed bachelor” when applied to men in this age group was a euphemism used by newspapers for being gay. Now it seems increasing numbers of men are unwilling to exchange the life of a bachelor for the life of a married man.
I’ve read similar articles written by single women complaining that eligible men simply refuse to commit and get married making finding a good husband all but impossible for women of a certain age.
At what point does the footloose happy bachelor become a sad spinster ? If indeed he does !
There is a raft of psychobabble as to why men are not getting married but there was no mention of some obvious and salient points as far as I was concerned.
Firstly, instead of wondering what is up with these men why not look at it from their point ?
What’s in it for me ?
Another suggestion for this is that men have become to attached to the freedom and lack of responsibility of the bachelor life.
Could it be they have also become attached to everything they have worked for ?
Modern divorce settlements in the UK have been hailed as liberating for women - I would suggest there is a flip side to that coin.
Many women are denied the possibility of marrying a good man because of the risk of divorce.
Indeed there are men out there who feel they are denied the choice of marriage because of punitive and unjust divorce settlements.
The question is are men such as myself sad losers or men ahead of the game ?
Regards
Rod
Little Brother said,
October 6, 2008 @ 9:16 pm
Rod,
Good post, it got me thinking about that too. There’s no point in thinking you have to get settled down to avoid being alone in older age. You and I both know, sadly, a number of people who have lost their husbands/wives shortly before or just after retirement. Life is a lottery and maybe I’ve been dealt a single ticket but I’d rather be on my own than stuck with somebody I no longer cared for like so many do.
I’m sure Canon UK and BMW will be delighted to know I’ve no plans for giving up my materialistic lifestyle just yet
LB
Rod said,
October 7, 2008 @ 8:49 am
LB
there is a good argument for saying the older you get the more reason not to marry.
A young man getting divorced (after all most marriages end that way so you’re more likely to divorce than stay together) has the years left to hopefully start again.
But older men ?
I remember working with a guy that found himself in a rented flat above a shop in Cleethorpes at 57 years of age because his wife announced she “fancied a change”
A lost a 4 lovely bedroom detached house - there was no way he was ever going to get back to where he was at his age !
Cheers
Rod
WoE said,
October 7, 2008 @ 1:57 pm
Rod,
It’s stalemate then with no losers and no winners. You have to wonder as you sit on the commode of old age, whether all that you treasure now was worth it? Perhaps good company at close quarters is enough to see people through without actually parting with any worldly goods. That’s fine for those without children but for those who have, it can be very challenging… the care and up bringing of children takes a lot more than one adult … we salute them and their selfless efforts.
The older man, well he should perhaps be on the lookout for the older woman, financially sound and ready to commit…… and that’s exactly what she should be, committed
What, give up the life of Riley to look after some old man who’s always ranting away about sock etiquette and ‘what’s in it for me’…. she’d have to be mad 
WoE
Rod said,
October 7, 2008 @ 2:36 pm
WoE
I don’t really mean to make any deep rooted statements by the post it was merely the fact that I’m getting increasingly irked by the lack of straight forward honest truth out there in this modern world.
It was ridiculous to read opinions that suggested even things like Nintendos were responsible for huge numbers of men not wanting to get married.
Nobody seems to want to tell it like it is nowadays !
Best
Rod
Femme Fatale said,
October 9, 2008 @ 8:50 pm
Rod,
Get married and live in separate houses, Perfect
FF
xx