Just think what you could have achieved with a proper javlin throwers belt and modern day kit.

Women love javlin throwers you know, you only have to look at Jan Zelezny in his prime!

WoE

Obviously like most of us standing out there in all weathers, sport was perhaps not his thing either.

Can you remember those cross-country runs, five miles in the middle of winter, what was all that about, and all that messing about with one of those spring boards and vaulting-horse-things. I wonder if they still do all that, I mean we are talking a lot of years ago, but things may not have altered that much.

Many years ago when I was at school, my interest in sport was nil, but I did have a gift for wanging, chucking or whacking something.

I shall go on, anyway we had a PE teacher, a part time stand-in, I believe his speciality was drama, ok you got the picture.

Anyway back to the story, I stood there with a lit Players No6 in one hand and a Javelin in the other to my left was another teacher, a possible school record was on the cards and a jerk was standing in the line-of-fire waving his arms around, shouting that I should have a go at the record, great I had a target, let him have it was the cry from the spectators behind.

With a fag clenched tightly between my teeth I set about launching the javelin, away it went, I knew when this thing was in the air it was going to be the ultimate javelin throw, only one problem, there is still a jerk in the line-of-fire waving his arms around and to my back all I could hear were the spectators hearts thumping. Anyway it missed, not by much, but enough to upset him and get me the cane.

On a serious note, sounds as though you are looking for a new hobby or interest, I am sure there are numerous pastimes to be found locally, everything can be found in the county of Lincolnshire, its just knowing when and where.

Anyway must dash, I have had one of those days, everything has gone wrong that could go wrong, as such I must rectify the situation,
no point in finishing the day on a downer…..

To save on the Collins purse strings we’ve managed to locate a vintage plastic golf bat in the Coven shed … multi-coloured and short, with the odd dent, it looks a cheerful number and bound to get you noticed if the fetching outfit fails. You’ll need a caddy of course and we’ve sized up a nice vibrant shopping trolley which should fulfil all requirements including snacks. We’re certain that in no time Vuitton will be called upon to design your ‘wheels’.

Women love golfers Rod, you only have to look at some ‘fatty’ strolling around St Andrews in his cashmire sweater to realise there’d be no competition

WoE

Rod
PS: In the interests of ‘cleaning’ the site up you’ll all notice how I specifically left out all mention of ‘cabers’ and ‘tossing’

Not in the slightest.

Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.

Jordan