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How to Get Rid of a Useless Wife

The Europeans have much to teach us when it comes to disposing of a wife who is surplus to requirements !
The-Coxeman is back !

A guest article submitted by The Coxeman
Regular followers of my wisdom laden articles will be well aware that I am chronically allergic to getting married and have strongly advised real men to avoid marriage like the plague.
If however you have been stupid enough to get married, or more likely ensnared into the diabolical situation by a cunning woman - you need an exit strategy !

Here in the UK, and in America, ridding oneself of your millstone wife takes a great deal of time and is a matter of considerable expense.
Witness Paul McCartney and his troubles, whilst he brought it on himself and should have known better, it goes to show you just how grave are the ramifications of an unwise union.

Enter the Bulgarians - I’ve been there on missions in the past and have to say it was a country that imbued little to me. The women tended to look like Russian beet farmers, though there are a few would-be starlets and models in the capital city who seemed friendly and willing.

Imagine my surprise then when I find out today they are so far ahead of us in dealing with a wife who is no longer required.
The hero of the hour is Stoil Panayotov who decided his wife was taking up too much room and bearing him no offspring (a bonus in my mind but each to their own) so what did he do.

Give her his farm ?
Go back to live with his mother?
Start life financially all over again ?

No - he swapped her for a goat !

Clearly we have much to learn from our friends abroad who are clearly operating on a more enlightened level than we are.

It seems quite reasonable to me - how about you ?

It’s time we men were real men again - you know it makes sense
Keep it Up !
The Coxeman

11 Comments »

  1. Witches of Eastwick said,

    April 12, 2008 @ 9:23 pm

    Dear Coxey,

    If only it were that easy for the poor slaves wives over here…. vote goat for freedom!

    WoE

    p.s. he doesn’t know it yet but old Stoil got one of our new breed of vicious sabre toothed male hating goats… naturally we’re still working on the temperament side but on the cheese front nothing gets close…. not with those gnashers anyway :)

  2. the dinosaur said,

    April 13, 2008 @ 9:06 am

    WoE, I note you say “one of OUR new breed of vicious sabre toothed male hating goats”, I thought I had seen some dodgy looking females about town with beards!!! It’s the KIDS I feel sorry for :)

  3. The Coxeman said,

    April 13, 2008 @ 9:09 am

    Witchey
    If only it were that easy for the poor slaves wives over here

    I know what you mean - not much call for goats around here.
    It was a good deal, I suspect the goat will eat less than his wife, be cheaper to maintain and probably bleats less than his wife as well !

    I know someone who swapped his wife for the house his parents left him but more fool him - if only his ancestors had lived in eastern Europe

    To all women - Unshackle the manliness in your man
    Keep it Up !
    The Coxeman

  4. Rod said,

    April 13, 2008 @ 9:11 am

    Dino
    you’re on form this morning :)
    Rod

  5. Witches of Eastwick said,

    April 13, 2008 @ 9:47 am

    Coxey and Dino,

    Sound advice here for our host….. sow your wild goats before you jump the broomstick :)

    WoE

    p.s. for our younger readers, the jumping over a broomstick is part of an ancient wedding ceremony … and for our older readers like The Coxeman and Dino…. a Brenda Lee classic :)

  6. Rod said,

    April 13, 2008 @ 10:23 am

    WoE
    sow your wild goats before you jump the broomstick
    Excellent ! - Your on song as well evryone sems full of the joys of spring this Sunday morning!
    As our friend Rod Damon would say
    Keep it Up :)
    Rod

  7. the dinosaur said,

    April 13, 2008 @ 11:39 am

    WoE, thank you for informing myself and Coxey that Brenda Lee sang “Jump the Broomstick”, as it’s before our time, being a gentleman I can only say; you must only know this song because its obviously in the witches all time top ten hits because of the broomstick reference. Can you name the rest, I can think of “Hocus Pocus” by Focus and perhaps something by Black Sabbath or Siouxsie and Banshees?

  8. Witches of Eastwick said,

    April 13, 2008 @ 7:28 pm

    Dino,

    Well it’s a wonderful night for a moondance……… so says Van the man of course :)

    WoE

  9. the dinosaur said,

    April 13, 2008 @ 8:09 pm

    WoE, There’s that one about the wealthy witch: Lucy in the sky with diamonds :)

  10. Peach said,

    February 3, 2010 @ 2:50 pm

    Coxeman - I would advise you to convert to Is lam, then move to a country ruled by Sharia law.

    You’ll be able to not only mistreat the unfortunate women around you but also sell them, buy them, etc.

    PS - Disregard the above advice if you don’t like the idea of being stoned to death or publicly flogged for sex prior to marriage.

  11. Rod said,

    February 3, 2010 @ 2:52 pm

    Hi Peach,
    thanks for the comment and welcome to the site - I’ll pass theat on to The Coxeman ;)
    I suspect there’s more than a few who would like to see him stoned :)

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