How Many TV Channels Do I Need
Hearing today that someone has had something plugged into the wall and can now get 70 television channels left me feeling initially confused and subsequently something of a peasant.
I only have 5 channels! Everyone else, it seems, has more.
The petty nature of the Goldeneye psyche means I do not care how many channels I have just so long as it is one more than anyone else I know 
I only really watch movies as TV seems mostly garbage to me, mostly too high brow for my simple mentality, so given that they cannot fill 5 channels how do they go about filling 70 ?
I may need to look into this as I don’t want to miss out on anything.
I do not want any sport but Bart Simpson and Hot Chick type programmes would be good.
I am left pondering the following [edit: this was to be 4 questions]
Will this dip into the Goldeneye purse?
Will I have to have anything done this end?
Is it worth bothering with?
Are they showing re-runs of Baywatch?
Why can’t I give someone directions with it turning into a saga?
Why did it take 2 days to find out about Port 25?
Why do men know more about washing than women?
Why are sofas so difficult to clean?
What happened to my rechargeable batteries?
Why is it impossible to buy men’s underwear?
Would people think badly of me if I switched to women’s - there’s more choice?
Why should kids get homework?
Why does my grass grow so quickly?
Where has all the petrol gone from my car?
Why is there no food in the fridge?
What shall I do tomorrow?
errr…….. ummmm…… got a bit carried away with just some of the things that crossed my mind today
Witches of Eastwick said,
September 28, 2006 @ 8:24 pm
Rod, don’t you have a digibox (think that’s what it’s called)? Everyone here has had extra channels for ages but I can tell you there’s still not much to be gained. Channel 31 has movies every day but haven’t noticed much in the way of hot chick programmes thankfully, think you have to pay for those ….. so is it worth it for you? We could get technical but for your sake we’ll stick to the more vital points raised above. Can we get the trouser situation under control before we hit the M&S ladies undies section (changing rooms are out of the question before you ask)? It would be killing two birds with one stone, all your groceries and smalls under one roof, now that’ll save petrol! WoE
p.s. we flew by a fine eating establishment today and managed to get an interview with the Head Chef … I think I’m starting work on Monday! Do you think the gang could meet up there one day considering OMITK might have difficulty escaping on Tuesday? It looks a refined joint so we might have to wash beforehand and rethink our usual topics! I noticed a helipad so Ursula could drop in …. don’t tell him though, or he’ll have time to lock the doors.
Rod said,
September 29, 2006 @ 9:00 am
WoE,
I don’t have digi anything I am afraid. Your confirmation that everyone there has one confirms my initial suspicions.
Good point re the falling trouser situation! I perhaps should buy a belt before a digibox
Certainly if I decide to start buying from a different department I will need to ensure the trousers stay up in public!
I did hear that OMITK had a flying visit - God help you if you are starting to work with him.
I would doubt, even knowing all the right people as we do, that such a refined venue would allow the likes of us in
Slainte
Rod
The Coxeman said,
September 29, 2006 @ 2:25 pm
How many times have I said you are a Nancy Boy ?
Nobody listened to me - now they know!
Keep it Up!
The Coxeman
Our Man in the Kitchen said,
September 29, 2006 @ 2:35 pm
Dear WOE,
Sorry to inform you via cyberspace but I cannot employ you, it is obvious to me that you are a woman of considerable intelligence so you would never fit in with my lot.
Reverend Rod, following a suprise (and slightly terrifying) visit from a Lincolnshire Witch of dubious merit I have taken your advice and now wear a large crucifix and a rope of garlic around my neck although I wasn’t very popular at the Drill Hall last night!
Witches of Eastwick said,
September 29, 2006 @ 4:09 pm
OMITK,
If you think that a necklace and a few onions will save you, then think again. Prepare yourself, the Witches will be making a flying visit to your fine establishment next week, should the broomstick re-twigging be successful. Don’t worry we’ll give plenty of notice incase you require the odd brandy or three. Rev Rod is welcome to join us but quite frankly, Tuesday afternoons are probably all the poor man can take, so no great expectations there. We’ll tell him there’s a womans shoe convention going on and then just see if he can resist.
We promise not to be too much trouble. Organic Colombian at the ready if you please! WoE
Jodan said,
October 2, 2006 @ 10:29 am
Get a FreeView box, cost £20ish, no monthly payments or added extras.
No Baywatch re-runs, but, Jeremy Brett Sherlock Holmes and Lovejoy.
2 music channels.
E4. Film 4
all good stuff
Rod said,
October 2, 2006 @ 12:11 pm
Jordan,
don’t mention Lovejoy for £20, I’ve spent almost £180 buying 6 boxsets on DVD
Watched a Jeremy Brett the other night, still fabulous, especially now they’ve been remastered
I’ll start saving for a freeview box on your advice
Regards
Rod
Jordan said,
October 2, 2006 @ 1:26 pm
In the famous words of ‘Homer Simpson’ DOH!!
Thats £180 you have overspent, wasted, thrown away, Frittered away, squandered, misused, I can’t believe your unthriftiness!!
You should be berating yourself for the rest of the day, week, month even and it is only the 2nd of October!.
You dissapoint me and i would think a lot of your friends and readers of this site!
Frivolous Rod you shall now be named, fellow readers, address your comments to Frivolous Rod in future.
Rod said,
October 2, 2006 @ 2:40 pm
Frivolous Rod,
you know what they say about a fool and his money !
I don’t even want to think how much I have blown on all the other DVDs and box sets - lest I begin to cry.
You are right though, a new regime is called for, all unnecessary spending shall cease forthwith.
Here’s to the new regime and commiserations to the clothes shops of Lincolnshire, a black day for them
Jordan said,
October 4, 2006 @ 10:57 am
Frivolous Rod,
Something tells me you have been wasting your money again
Rod said,
October 4, 2006 @ 1:23 pm
Jordan
you have a sixth sense!
I bought a pair of trousers on Saturday almost identical to another pair I have.
Today I bought a new shirt because I was bored.
I need to get out of this malaise and get back to hoarding my pennies.
One day the Hedgehog Preservation Society will be grateful for it
Best
Rod
Jordan said,
October 4, 2006 @ 5:28 pm
Friv Rod,
Tut, tut, tut, i am sure your friends in higher places shake their heads in woe, still waiting for the sky to come falling down around them, and cooking for the rich.
Rod said,
October 4, 2006 @ 6:31 pm
Jordan,
very distressing for some indeed, especially someone in Lincoln, who breaks out in a cold sweat at the very thought of doing anything with money other than
“wanging it in the buildo”
Prost
Rod